What's new at FireboxI probably should have written this as soon as I got home, as I’ve since had a little sleepy and some lush foods (M&S Sweet Pumpkin and Amaretti Biscuit Ravioli, far nicer than it sounds), I feel less like ranting.
There’s an update to my previous post about my credit card woes. I still haven’t had the amount credited back to me. While I have just been re-assured again that I won’t have to pay, I don’t like that amount sitting on my card for so long. It means my limit is far too close. An emergency now would be disastrous.
However, it would appear I now have the address of the ****s who used my card. They share my surname, so it seems as though my details could well have been sold to them. What makes me really, really angry to the point of my blood boiling though… is that they are clearly better off than me. So why not use your own money you evil, thieving bastards!
http://www.millsproductions.co.uk/
This is the woman whose name is on the invoice I’ve just received from dabs.com
http://www.millsproductions.co.uk/clare-mills.shtml
She doesn’t look like an internet criminal, she looks like my techno-phobe mother. Looks can be deceiving.
Arrrgghhhh! CostCo now sell crates of Relentless…. so now I have a crate of it in the garage… along with 2 crates of RedBull…. No sleep for me!
No I don’t think these drinks taste like cough medicine or earwax or syrup, I actually like them.
I really want one of these for Christmas… *hint* *hint*
These look so cool! As a non-tea drinker, but an expert in colour-matching, I have used a Dulux colour chart before to get the shade right (my Dad’s a painter & decorator so we have them lying around).
I’ve managed to let myself get thoroughly bored. I can’t actually remember what I’ve done lately.. this is more a recap for myself:
wishing I had more sleep… and more shoes…
I’ve been depressed again the last couple of days. No real reason for it at all. I just want a big hug and to be told everything will be OK.
My weekends right now are awesome, fun-packed. But the weeks… the weeks are bad. It’s getting worse. I know this is just because I’m leaving work. I am getting home stressed, managing to claw back some semblance of happiness by using every Sanctuary Spa product I can find and plonking myself down next to my uber nice TV.
Last night that just didn’t work. I found myself getting a headache and getting to sleep just wasn’t happening. I still have the headache today. I hope this cloud clears. I have no real reason to feel so rubbish :o(
Add to that the fact that PodPads for this years Latitude are a whopping £399.95… even with the £50 refundable deposit… err no thanks! Which means camping alone. I hate camping. I hate tents. And I also hate the fact that the tent is not lockable or in the VIP area like the PodPads. But I just can’t afford to spend £500 just for a festival. Looks like this won’t be such a great festival for me after all. Lugging a tent all that way was not my plan.
Anyhoo, I have a headache still… but I’ve bought looooads more Sanctuary Kyphi stuff. I shall get home tonight and block it all out.
I’ve done pretty well so far in not venting my frustration and sadness about ‘the breakup’, but tonight was the last fucking straw.
It is safe to say I did not want to split up. I thought it was worth working at. Chris, however, just couldn’t be bothered. I guess he knew he didn’t love me & had no intention of spending his life with me, so there wasn’t much point in him making any effort.
He still has a drink problem. He still surrounds himself with superficial idiots… but then I think I get why that is now. (Something he said to me the other week is very true. He said “on the surface I’m a really sound bloke, but once you dig deeper I’m a real arsehole.” I guess he likes hanging around with people that will never dig deeper.)
I on the other hand have forced myself to get some hobbies (I am learning BSL - British Sign Language). I have applied for redundancy at work. I’ve even attempted socialising again… although people are the issue with this one.
So really… he couldn’t be arsed to sort his life out for “us”… and he still can’t be arsed to sort it now. This probably means I am best out of it. But in my mind I just know he’ll meet someone that will turn his life around. She’ll be worth doing all this for… and my heart will break all over again…
So, anyway, tonight.
I had a really good day today. I had the day off work. I went into London. I bought lots of fluffy things in Hamleys. I got a second GloomyBear arm from PlayLounge. I wandered around backstreets in Westminster looking at buildings. I saw the Institute of Physics! I met up with Dezzy for a drink. I headed back to Reading. I had some time to kill so went to the Rising…. no-one in there & didn’t get served. Thought sod this, went to the Turks. Walked in, got a drink. Looked about. Saw some people I knew, but no-one to sit with. Then I saw Scunty. Bit weird as Chris, Scunty & Evil Pete were meant to be staying in this weekend. Didn’t expect to see him. Also realised if he was there… it meant Chris was there… Was really good to see Scunty. I haven’t spoken to him in a long time. I miss him. He was a good friend once, always made me laugh. Chris walked past, said hello.
Then it happened. I got soundly ignored by everyone else. I mean… for fuck’s sake… WHY?! I have done nothing to them. I haven’t even done anything wrong. Chris dumped me because he didn’t love me. How am I the villain here? Right now I need all the friends I can get. It’s amazing how shitty people treat me when I’m not Chris’ girlfriend. This has happened before when we split up. Then we got back together & everyone was nice to me again. It’s ridiculous! I really can’t see why they’re doing this. These are not all people that I only know through Chris. Some of them I’ve known even longer than I’ve known him.
All I can think of is there’s some rumours going around about me that I haven’t heard yet… be interested to know what they are. Even when Chris cheated on me people acted like I had done something wrong… I hate people. They fucking suck.
